Salmon and Buttered Onions Tart

Autumn makes me want to fill the house with nice smelling warm things from the oven. Especially with something nice and crunchy on the outside and wobbly and sorta gooey on the inside with caramelly cruchy onions nestled between pink salmon with flecks of dill. I know the picture from my phone does not do justice (especially since I forgot to take a picture until 2 big slices were already cut out from it), but the taste is as good as it sounds. And it took me only 40 mins (that is 2 episodes of Dora the Explorer or Mickey Mouse Clubhouse in kidspeak) with an almost instant homemade crust.

The Shortcut way to the Shortcrust Pastry

How did I do the almost instant homemade crust? Behold my food processor!! It is not even a fancy one. Or a Jamie Oliver one. Just a Phillips one that I bought coz the packaging said that its tall design ensures that minimum counter space was needed and it was at a reasonable price. But oh my Lord, it slices, dices, mixes and even makes pastry!! How cool is that? Actually I think all food processors can do that. So nobody has to rush out to buy the one I've got (especially since I am not famous yet hur hur). Anyway that is my shortcut secret to crunchy perfect pastry everytime. And I follow a foolproof 1:2 ratio of butter:flour. So in this case,

• 200g all purpose flour
• 100g cold butter (80g if you're feeling guilty, but then if you're feeling guilty, there's no point baking this is there?)
• A pinch of salt.
• 2-4 tablespoons of cold water (but don't add them all in one go!)

Put everything EXCEPT the water into the food processor and let it rip for about 20seconds or until the mixture looks like breadcrumbs. Then add in the 2 tablespoons of water and wait until the dough comes together. You will notice that the 'breadcrumbs' will get bigger and fatter and suddenly there is this lump of dough banging itself against the walls. If if doesn't do that, then add in more water, 1 tablespoon at a time. But be patient.

Then take the dough out and place it on a floured greaseproof paper. I just roll the dough out on the greaseproof paper and when the dough is the size I want it to be, I just lift the paper and place it such that the dough is above the pie dish, flip the paper 180 degrees and let the flattened dough drop squarely on the pie dish. Oh but remember to grease your pie dish first.

Then pop it into the fridge if you are not making it now, or into the oven at 180 degrees for about 5 mins while you prepare the filling that will take like 10 minutes.


The Salmon and Onion Filling

• 200g pack of frozen salmon (or fresh or smoked if you prefer)
• 2 or 3 large onions, depending on how much you like them. I used the food processor that made thin rings of onions in 30 seconds flat (I love my food processor!)
• Pinch of salt
• Dash of pepper
• Sprinkling of dill
• Shakes of garlic powder

I heated a pan with a tablespoon of butter and a splosh of olive oil to stop it from burning. Then in went the onion rings and I added the salt to encourage the water to seep out of the onions to prevent the filling from becoming too soggy. When the onion looked translucent and and limp, I added the fish and the rest of the ingredients and mashed and mixed them together. You don't have to add the fish at this stage if you are using smoked salmon though. When the fish is cooked through, turn off the heat and let it cool.

Meanwhile...

The Egg-Creme Fraiche Custard.

It is literally, just egg and creme fraiche, with seasonings, mixed together in a large bowl or a measuring jug for easy pouring.

• 3 eggs
• 250 gram carton of creme fraiche (or single cream)
• Shakes of salt and black pepper
• A little bit of milk if you need to stretch the custard to fill up your pie dish.
• And whatever herbs you want. I stuck to dried dill.

Ready? Set. Go!

I always had this problem of the egg custard mixture spilling on the counter, the oven door,the kitchen floor and wherever else,  as I transfer the pie dish, filled to the brim with filling and custard from the counter to the oven while saying "I will not spill this!". So I have developed this sure-fire method of making sure that it won't happen anymore neh ni neh ni pooh pooh :

• Take out the blind crust that has been cooked for about 5 mins and cooled a little
• Pour the salmon-onion filling into the crust, making sure you spread it evenly to ensure nobody is cheated of delicious filling in every bite.
• Open the oven door, slide the pie dish in.
• Put the greaseproof paper that you used to roll out the dough (or another piece of greaseproof paper) below the shelf your pie dish is on.
• Then and only then, pour the egg custard mixture into the pie dish.
• Close the door, and voila! No spillage on the kitchen floor and whatever spillage in the oven is being caught by the greaseproof paper.
• After about 5 minutes remover the greaseproof paper to prevent the egg custard droplets on them from turning black and crusty and giving your oven and the tart a burnt smell.

Ingenious, no?

So we bake the tart at 200 degrees for about 20-25 minutes but make sure you keep an eye on it. It will be puffy and golden and the onion slices that stuck out will be caramelized and bronzed. Take the piping hot tart from the oven and serve it with the Scrumptious Salad with Avacado and Other Good Things. And let the winds rage outside.

Yah-meh! Mission accomplished.